Tuesday, May 6, 2008

The Might Of Ages

Don't believe the hype: Germany will break through

Remember the battle in the the beginning of Gladiator? The Germanic tribes (thought to be the progenitors of modern Germans, but a lot of their customs and stock seem to have Celtic and Baltic roots) hit the Roman front line pretty hard. It totally looked like they were going to win the battle. But the foot soldiers were armored and well-winded -- and by the time the cavalry had entered the battle, the German[ian] army must have been exhausted.

There's a lot of needless speculation as to what has become of the Romans, but I share a theory with my advisor from college: that they are now the Northern Germans, fled north from Campania from the barbarians. Think about it: the Romans had engineering genius, a socialist state, order, discipline, pragmatism, thrift... ah, but it's all an idle theory.

The German football team, however, is one of my debating points. They look bad during the season (well, if the USA takes them on the 22nd, they are bad and there's nothing more to it), but when it's tournament time, they get their crap together. And, much like the great Fabius Maximus, nicknamed "The Delayer" for his tactics during the Punic wars, they will play a methodical technical game until they have worn their opponents out, and then they will score in the second half. This is the German way, unless they ruin my whole theory and focus the team around Ballack. Wait -- did the Felix region do that with Maximus?

UPDATE: Reuters has got Germany pegged to win the Cup.

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