As far as Hollywood is concerned, there is only one look that's so beyond it's own beyondness that it's worth being seen as. People have started to notice the figure that Saddam cuts in the court room. The demi-gods are noticing the rants, the silences, the spectacular declarations of self-sacrifice. He's the mad and proud anti-hero that all Hollywood wants to be. In fact, he's every actor's fantasy. He's Scarface. And there's more to him - that stylish, tie-less appearance, the penetrating gaze. And he has a beard that speaks of grand apathy. Saddam finds the Romantic in all of us, and there is no greater declination of Romantic ideals than Hollywood cinema. He has the pride of Napoleon, the vanity of Lord Nelson, the madness of Ahab. He is Danton and Robespierre in one swarthy apparition.

Saddam Hussain - that's who they all want to be. Mel Gibson and George Clooney are already vying for the movie. Perhaps this will be the final indignity that America will wreak on its secret hero, that belligerent spirit floating above tonight's ceremonies.

You're all bonkers! Fuck off!