Look, there’s nothing wrong with going on vacation in Italy, of course (or in Germany, for that matter), but why not do it with a little pizzazz? I mean jeez, you Chancellor types are heads of state, people. You too, are valuable members of the international political community and deserve a little pampering now and again. Nobody in the UK seemed to care when Tony Blair organized an entire Tuscan palace for his vacation stay and the French don’t seem to mind if Jacques Chirac vacations like a king at the most exclusive hotel in Mauritius. Of course American Presidents are prohibited by law to take vacations (I think), so they just go off to Camp David or to one of their ranches somewhere for really, really long weekends every once in awhile. But they do so with great style.

And Angela Merkel? She got left holding the bag for all of this frugality Wahn (craziness) big time last week, folks. None of her predecessors had the nerve to set a precedent by doing one of these first-class-exclusive-secluded-French-presidential-five-star-plus-vacations and now poor Angie felt obligated to do the same and books another cheapo-package-deal-Chancellor-vacation and literally gets caught with her pants down while trying to find some place to change her swimsuit on the beach. Paparazzi-wise, that is. I mean, what is that?

The Sun did Germany a great service by publishing these naked butt photos. Now, at the very latest, it should be clear to all of us (and most of you) that the era of falsche Bescheidenheit (false modesty) for German Chancellors must finally come to a close. At least as far as vacations are concerned. It would be irresponsible to continue allowing hard-working and over-stressed German heads of government to board in billigen Absteigen (cheap quarters) while on vacation. The higher class joints keep the paparazzi at bay, or pay them off better. And after all, if you believe half the stuff the British have been writing about the “Merkel miracle” these days, anything less representative than the most representative accommodations you can find would be entirely inappropriate for the new German Wunder Woman.

Had Angela Merkel shown more discretion in picking her vacation accommodations last week, she wouldn’t have regretted showing less discretion on the beach. But now that the bottom has fallen out of this honorable old German tradition, Angie should and even must (please!) go ahead and give herself a little push and make sure that next summer, at the very latest, these old-fashioned cheapo Chancellor vacations are finally put behind her.

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