Don't Ask the Times: An Epic-Cheap Berlin Travel Guide (part 5)
BEST MONEY-SAVING TIP
Don't buy a week ticket like those Times gaylords told you -- what happens when Anna decides she likes you, and you don't leave her apartment all weekend? That's two days of free passage down the drain: about €11.
Let me give you some information that is actually worth a sparrow dick. Double-stamp your ticket. Let me explain:
1. A single-ride ticket is €2.10, and lasts for two hours. If you're just going somewhere quick and back, it's way better to use this technique to buy two of these, or even worse, a day ticket, which is €5.80.
2. If you look at the stamp a validation drops on your ticket, it's split up thus:
Fold an old ticket along the dotted line and tear. See how the origin is a little light, but the rest of the stamp is dark? That's the most common stamping quirk, and why this whole op is possible. When you stamp your ticket for the first time, slip #2 in there over your ticket. This will prevent the machine from stamping the origin, and if a ticket taker gives you problems, blame the machine (while being able to automatically name your station). They know the deal, so you'll get off. Now, on your return trip, slip #1 over your ticket so you can stamp the other side. Now it's completely legit and you can buy another drink.
If you get controlled for any reason, your [foreign] identity is your power. When you're in the "zone of death," never speak German or produce a passport or ID. Instead, cry ignorance. Without any identification, the ticket they'd issue you is worthless, and they're not cops, so your getaway is clear. If they insist, you live at 123 Falschstrasse. After they leave, throw away your ticket and laugh. But don't ride that line again for the rest of the trip.
Extra Bonus Hint: Bus drivers could often care less whether the ticket you flash in their face is valid. You're the fourth in a line of 12, and there's a 90% chance the guy has completely given up on life. Go for it.
Now, if you've read carefully and you keep your wits about you, you'll be runnin' thangs in Berlin this summer! Tell em the Fritz sent ya!
Comments
Well done. This is the kind of Berlin navigation info people need, poor, broke-ass, subversive student / artist people... This is why your blog will be beloved.
My $0.02: The feigning of foreigner ignorance doesn't work these days as much as it used to in, say, 1991 (when I arrived). Now, if you give them a fake address, the call the cops to confirm (I'm speaking from experience here). But, yes, be as annoyingly ignorant as possible and there is a good chance they'll let you go out of pity and/or frustration.
One more tip: On a bus, when the controller walks up to the second level (where you're sitting and/or sweating) and assuming that your bus has almost reached the next stop, just walk down the steps and when the controller down there asks for your ticket, act a little irritated and say you already got checked on the top. He'll let you go, slightly embarrassed, even. That's my favourite one. Works like a charm.
Ben; May 5, 2006 6:39 PM
correction: I arrived in 1999
Ben; May 5, 2006 6:46 PM
Why don't you get a "Semesterticket" from someone, scan it, photoshop your name into it, print it out on a color laser printer and put it in one of those clear plastic folders? They won't recognize the difference. That is the long-term solution.
steini; May 5, 2006 9:33 PM
nice work!
juanito perez; May 6, 2006 6:15 AM